I’m really not sure why such an emphasis is being placed on “respect”. when I visit a lady respect is just about the last thing on my mind.’ A punter.

How any married man can allow his wife to work in this industry is something I will never understand…a man who allows his wife to rent out her body to every Tom, Dick and Abdul obviously has no respect for her.’

A brief introduction

Punternet.com is a British website where ‘punters’ (sex buyers) post reviews of ‘escorts’ (sex sellers); [1] the site also hosts a discussion forum. The word ‘escort’ in this context refers to a woman who (according to Punternet) freely chose the job and works freelance, unforced, indoors (home, brothel, massage parlour, hotel). This is the type of prostitution that most people think benign, and which punters and the English Collective of Prostitutes passionately defend. I joined the site in 2009,[2] read reviews and eavesdropped on discussions.

The comments below were posted by punters. They expose as a lie the claims that punters respect the women they buy. If an escort fails to meet punters’ ideal (young, thin, obedient and eager) she is insulted and called a ‘whore’ or a ‘bitch’ and referred to as ‘it’ or ‘the thing’. Punters claim never to exploit those who appear to be unwilling, forced or drugged, and yet the quotes prove that this is untrue, and reveal that punters do not care a jot for the escort’s comfort, welfare or health.

Disrespect relating to her age and size

The most desirable escorts are those of the youngest legal age, eighteen, and with the tiniest bodies. The further an escort deviates from that, the more she is despised. Even punters in their sixties considered an escort twenty years their junior ‘too old’ and deserving of insult.

‘I travelled to see Sinead. Who wouldn’t? Size 6, 18 years old!!!’

‘Her body isn’t as firm and tight and trim as it should be for a 22 yr old, no chance, more like 32.’

‘This lady has reached her sell-by date.’ [Written by ‘Granddad’.]

‘Over [size 12] and I would feel like I was wrestling with a sumo.’

‘Not fat ones…would feel cheated to pay for one.’

‘Describes herself as…size 14.. she must be a size 18.. All I wanted to do was get out as quick as possible.’

‘She was late, and two dress sizes too big.’

‘19 yrs old blonde…needs to lose a little flab around the midriff.’

‘Nice girl but too chubby I’m afraid.’

‘Looked older and fatter (size 14 in my opinion compared to the size 8 advertised). This was plain deception and therefore not only will I never see Somaya again.’

‘The liars get away with it because the industry is unregulated. It is not like going into a shop where the consumer has rights.’

‘If you like shagging wrinkly skinny granny types, then pay her a visit.’

‘I am an early 20s male and fancied trying an older lady…she was in her mid 50s but I was determined to have some older pussy… When I fuck, I fuck HARD! and within a minute she was asking me to take it easy on her old back. Began to pump away again as she told me I really knew how to fuck a girl (or in her case an old dog). Didn’t want to embarrass the old whore by coming on her tits or face.’

‘She looked nearer 60 than 50, but I made the most of her and called her a cock sucking bitch. I said get on your back and take some real cock you whore. I asked if I could call her names first as it would be the only way I could maintain a hard on with such a woman.’

Ignoring her obvious aversion

The site owners and users declare that they support, review, patronise and approve only those escorts who are working in prostitution of their own free will. However, when an escort’s demeanour shows aversion, even repugnance, punters’ only concern is that they are not getting what they paid for.

‘Truly she hates her job and is taking it out on men. Why become a pro if you cannot perform your duties?’

‘She was just distant, uninterested and quite cold, did not perform well and did not care at all about the paying client.’

‘Little was on offer in terms of service, enthusiasm, responsiveness or conversation. If she had worked anywhere else she’d probably have been sacked.’

‘I could have literally been shagging the pillow and got more response….I’m paying for this and expect a decent service … I can only assume she hates what she does.’

‘A Russian whore… her mind was somewhere else from the beginning. Looked dull, not interested at all.’

‘I thought she was sleeping. No noise, eyes closed… So pumped a bit harder and faster and it was all over.’

‘She obviously doesn’t enjoy doing this, and doesn’t even make an effort to pretend that she does.’

‘She was very uninterested and clearly doesn’t like her job, she even told me so, which didn’t exactly fill me with confidence.’

‘She made it clear that she was only doing this job out of absolute financial necessity and did not enjoy it.’

‘Seemed quite switched off and uninterested… A robotic type performance. It was like being treated like a dirty old car going through the car wash. Unless she is going to start enjoying herself a bit more it doesn’t matter how young she is I won’t be returning.’

‘Their sweetness, friendliness and femininity gradually diminishes away to uncover a colder more unappealing personality. Perhaps they start to secretly despise men and start viewing them as objects which hand over money.’

‘[It was] the sort of experience that you have with your girlfriend when she doesn’t really want a shag, but when you pester her into it.’

‘She just was like a piece of meat… so I thought I better put my cock in her mouth and instead of giving me a blow-job she started to wank me … I didn’t pay for a wank! I put the condom on and started to fuck her! I thought I have paid so I better fuck her hard! I decided to put the legs on my shoulders and I was pumping hard!’

‘I’m sick of paying for sex, getting nothing more than robotic treatment and being smirked at on my way out from the place.’

‘The main event was like shagging a dead fish (No reaction from her at all).’

‘She was not the least bit interested… cold and monosyllabic… as lively as a corpse.’

‘The [Korean] girl obviously didn’t want to perform… Maybe it is my age (over 50) and she was expecting someone younger — but after all, isn’t that why we go, to imagine we are young and sexy again? I can appreciate physical disinterest but her social skills were lacking. She didn’t show distaste — that is understandable… just lack of anything. Maybe it was her way of cutting herself off.’

‘I felt like I was pumping an android for the most part.’

‘She was so lifeless, silent and unenthusiastic! Was motionless and silent throughout, was glad to come so that it would end!’

‘She allowed me to cum on her body but this she clearly hated and ran off to the bathroom to clean and have a shower.’

‘Quite reluctant, got the feeling she wanted to get away with doing the absolute minimum.’

‘Eastern European girl without a word of English. No spirit, forced attitude and a complete disinterest from the start.’

‘When I asked for a bit of participation on her part, she said, “My legs are open, isn’t that enough?”’

‘It just felt as though she was going through the motions… needs to learn some dedication to her job.’

‘Her demeanour and service was just too shoddy… gave me a thoroughly uninterested blowjob. Every now and then she came up for air and moved her jaw from side to side, rubbing her face and scowling… I asked if she licked balls… whereby she reacted as if to feign being sick and said “No”. By this point her obvious desire to end the encounter had pissed me off totally… She… proceeded to tell me an extremely sad personal tale… She looked like she was going to cry, but soldiered on… I felt like crap, as if I was abusing the poor girl. I came, momentarily she let some emotion pass over her face, and then returned to a scowl. I got dressed and left, thoroughly upset and feeling cheated, a bastard and the lowest of the low. Girls like this should not be working. This is precisely why the industry needs regulating and some sort of customer protection needs to be introduced… I am also thoroughly annoyed. I needed cheering up because my life has taken a real crap dive of late but Heaven only succeeded in making me feel worse.’

‘NO eye contact… fake moaning, no real enthusiasm. She really needs to develop her routine/attitude.’

‘She did nothing, did not even touch me… This was a lazy, uninspired performance…  she is only interested in taking the money.’

‘She was completely disinterested and made no effort, an absolutely lacklustre performance… and she couldn’t wait to get out of room.’

‘Completely uncommunicative… shoved loads of lube up her fanny… it became clear that this could only be a wank into the body of the girl.’

‘Her behaviour was near catatonic. Her facial expression never varied. She looked like a collision between boredom and indifference. She climbed aboard and started humping. Facial expression unchanged and eyes dead.’

‘She… let me have sex only in mish [man on top], she closed the eyes and it was almost like she fell asleep.’

‘Completely uninterested. Eyes wide open and looking bored…. Eventually thought, better fuck it and go.’

‘During sex I was actually amazed by her silence, I mean, she really was somewhere else.’

‘This girl is an absolute frigid girl… She just said fuck me and go.’

‘Why can’t these lasses knock out a bit of value? Fucking was mechanical and passionless on her part. Had a gutful of these eastern Europeans who want the loot but only give a 3rd rate show.’

‘I just hammered away and shot my load, she may as well have been having her nails done.’

‘She acted as though she didn’t want to be there. She was boring, uninterested and a waste of money.’

‘She seemed completely uninterested & just opened her legs — a blow up doll would be better & cheaper.’

‘I climb on top, she’s avoiding eye contact and is lying motionless while I fuck her [and think] about something better than the thing on the bed.’

‘Cold, clinical, unfriendly and to be avoided. I hope they send her back to Romania.’

‘Had the feeling she really wished she was somewhere else… to be honest it put me off a bit.’

‘She arrived looking pissed off… the lack of enthusiasm was barely hidden. She climbed on top and I have to say I think she deliberately tried to hurt me. She leaned on my chest so hard I had to concede and ask to change positions. Now I’m a well built guy and she is quite slight so to exert so much pressure as to actually hurt must be deliberate, if not subconscious…’

‘Morgan just did not want to be there. Maybe it’s the credit crunch forced her into selling herself to pay the mortgage.’

‘Every attempt at intimacy was blocked with a turned away face.’

‘Sat on the bed about as far away from me as possible, making no move whatsoever to engage… Perfunctory fuck followed. Came. Went.’

‘Eastern European girl without a word of English. No spirit, forced attitude and a complete disinterest from the start.’

‘I wanked into her cunt whilst she tried to get some sleep.’

‘Her English is very limited and she makes it very clear through her body language that she would rather be doing something else.’

‘She seemed nice enough but has been damaged by the industry and seems to be going through a robot-like routine without any attachment to her punter.’

‘I really don’t think she enjoys this job… it makes you feel a proper perv shagging a dead body who won’t stop looking away.’

‘I felt like I was moving a sack of potatoes around the bed… it was like sticking my cock in a corpse.’

‘Let me fuck her but she just lay motionless, I pulled the condom off just before I came and wanked until I splashed my load in her face.’

‘No eye contact, stiff as a board. Wished I had bought a rubber doll from adult shop and would probably have got more fun from that.’

‘Her facial expression was completely glassed and uninterested… she just lay there’.

‘She was cold and distant …[she] put some lubricant on her pussy and opened her legs, she looked like someone waiting for something terrible, I wanted to leave, but … just to have back my money’s worth, I went on to have sex, it felt terrible, she closed her eyes and felt like dead.’

‘She lay back on the bed like a motionless sack of potatoes… I was doing the best I could in trying to get my money’s worth. I phoned the agency as soon as I walked out of the house and told them that her attitude stinks.’

‘[Tiny Singaporean] turned out to be the most unresponsive girl I’ve ever punted with. She didn’t so much recoil from my touch, as freeze, rooted to the spot, so I just let her plough on with the… sex for which I’d paid… I thought doggy would be the way to go, the added bonus being that I didn’t have to look at her sulky expression that way.’

‘She really hates this job and is happy to tell you.’

One punter assessed the attitude of the many escorts he had used. 80% were unable to conceal their dislike.

engagement

Active dislike 5%
Passive dislike or ‘I can put up with it’ 10%
Detachment with no interest in how the punter is getting on 45%
Detachment with some interest or curiosity about the punter’s state 20%
Attention to doing things to add to the punter’s pleasure 15%
Better than that: positive and active attention 5%

Not caring that she was high on drugs

‘Small, anorexic-looking drugged-up blonde… no tits at all, and a skinny, tall drugged-up brunette… both hideous and spaced out.’ [He still used her.]

‘As she exposed her arms the evidence of a BAD drugs habit was apparent with the marks on her arms impossible to disguise.’ [He still used her.]

‘My first impression when I saw her was to walk out, but for 10 pounds I thought I’d give it a go… She had her eyes closed, I could tell she was high on drugs, definitely skunk… this got me really angry.’ [He still used her.]

‘Judging by her body is obviously on drugs.’ [He still used her.]

‘Be careful with this girl all is not as it seems, I think she is chemically assisted.’ [He still used her.]

‘This THING is a real health hazard. She was half asleep definitely on drugs saw a pipe on her table and smelt and looked dirty.’ [He still used her.]

‘She was about 26, (maybe only 19 but the tough life aged her prematurely?), and once her clothes were off it went downhill. Saggy tits due to a child, painfully thin with bruises.’ [He still used her.]

‘She really wasn’t with it and clearly didn’t want to be there… Sex was just an average shag which Amanda simply didn’t take part in.’

Disrespecting her wishes, boundaries and autonomy

‘To be told what I was going to do for my money kind of got my goat a little.’

‘I chose Roxy because she does anal, but No Chance! How about a kiss then? She turned her head away constantly.’

‘No oral and no anal. The previous review said that she never says “no”, but I found that there were a lot of disturbing voices of “no” while I was trying to take the lead.’

‘The website describes Alexis as ‘a very friendly lady with an open personality who is game for practically all services’. Er, no! Everything she said was, No, I don’t do that or I don’t like that!’

‘[Hungarian aged 18] turns up… looking miserable… Might as well have bought a dummy, at least the dummy wouldn’t refuse 99% of the time. No cum in mouth, no kissing. Wouldn’t smile or respond in any way apart from constant yawning. Complete & utter rip off.’

‘She consistently came up with one excuse after another, mixed with blunt refusals to do anything properly or how I asked her to. She refused to move to where I asked her to, she refused any positions I asked for.’

‘I asked her to go on top which she was reluctant to do and refused to do any work and I went limp so in the end I had to manipulate her body which after a while was a bit like fucking an unconscious girl, which was a bit disconcerting. As I got dressed she moaned on and on about not liking it on top.’

‘All she did was moan, moan, moan. Don’t touch this, don’t do that, don’t put any weight on me.’

‘Totally uninterested gum chewing tart… [She] moved into a position where she couldn’t touch me nor I her… Rubbish cocksuck, with her eyes closed, followed by fucking her sloppy lube filled cunt. Total waste of time and money. There’s a warning on the bedroom door — “no refunds” — presumably because of all the punters who have complained about the shit service. There’s a male minder as well, presumably for the same reason.’

‘When I asked for [oral without a condom], she took offence, saying I should show respect (I was paying for a service!)’

‘When I asked about anal I was told not available on first meeting! Well I ain’t starting a relationship with you, love. I just want to fuck you up the arse!’

‘Blaise was a big disappointment…quite dominant and says ‘Do this, don’t do that’, and this was a bit annoying.’

‘She has her own exact idea of the service she provides — she tells you exactly what to do and where to stand or sit (not in a dominatrix sort of way, just in a pernickety old woman’s way) and will not let you do what you want. She is oblivious to the fact that you are paying to do (within reason and agreed limits, of course) what you want, not what she wants you to do.’

‘Wouldn’t lift her legs up for more entry. What I had to settle with wasn’t very enjoyable.’

‘Bailey would not let me fully penetrate, and left her hand in between (insisting that the condom may rip). This was a really big turn off.’

‘She started by half-blocking her pussy with her fingers, and making it very hard to get any penetration.’

‘She insisted on an awkward position with one leg up and one down — obviously intended to limit penetration — well it limited any enjoyment too.’

 ‘Typical like a lot of British Asian girls unless they feel they are the ones in control and power and dictating the orders they don’t want to know. Avoid like the plague.’

‘Fantastic tits but said I couldn’t touch them as she was expecting her period soon and they were sensitive (I was already starting to feel short-changed).’

‘I went to see Kim [having heard] she was a squirter. However… squirting did not occur, Kim said that she has to “be in the mood”… not worth her fee for half an hour.’

The ‘girlfriend experience’ (GFE)

Some punters want a ‘girlfriend experience’ (GFE). The escort acts as though she is the punter’s girlfriend, which means doing anything without complaint and whilst pretending to enjoy it.

‘There were too many “don’t do this or that” for this to be an enjoyable GFE.’

‘Many prostitutes are just not capable of delivering a convincing GFE, hardly surprising when so many of them hate everything about the work.’

‘Common as fuck, gum-chewing Hungarian whore… Transpired that she had been fucked silly all afternoon and here was I… expecting some type of GFE. So I fucked her as hard as I could in doggy, got a few yelps out of her, but she was well used to it.’

‘I just wanted to spend some quality time with a nice lady. Instead I got a shameless whore.’

Disrespecting her wish not to be physically hurt

Despite the claims that punters are concerned with escorts’ welfare, women who show pain are treated as a nuisance and as failing to provide a service. One frequent complaint is that, having specified that he wants a tiny young girl, she cannot bear without pain the penis or fingers of a Western man, nor his bodyweight or thrusting. If she tried to protect herself from pain and injury, punters complained.

‘[Very tiny Asian] winced and complained my fingers were too big…she started to ask “you want put condom on now boss”… After a while I asked for anal…“No, you too big, boss.” Useless.’

‘Asked her if she wanted to get on top first, which she did with her head face down in my neck… When I asked if she could sit up I was told no, you’re too big.’

‘I playfully gave her a little spank. She retorted quickly by saying “Don’t spank me. I’m only size 6 with hardly any fat so it hurts”.’

‘She didn’t want to stay on top of me… and, when I tried mish [man on top], she complained about my size, giving me the bullshit that I’m too big.’

‘Young whore from Portugal… complained that I had a “thick dick” which was a problem for her! I thought well if you can’t take it go find a day job!’

‘Her pussy was swollen and sore… She told me that she was very tired, and that the agency make her work all the time.’

‘Boobs too sore to suck… tried to shag her but again legs used to prevent full penetration, tried to thrust harder, was told “not so hard”… If I pay for a shag I expect to get one.’

‘No sucking tits and no touching her tits because of her boob jobs which made her feel pain.’

‘I couldn’t do this, I couldn’t do that. There was very little that I was able to do… complained she was sore.’

‘[She said] I’ve just finished a 2 hour appointment and my telula is really sore.’

‘Kept saying and moaning I was hurting her! Carried on not so deep in many positions (still she moaned).’

‘The saggy skin on the stomach was enough to put me off but the obvious pain she was in while shagging just rounded it off.’

‘She started to bleed really badly and covered my towel, bedsheets, pillows etc with blood. Absolutely disgusting… she apologised and said she did not expect this to happen as her period is not due for ages. I gave her the toilet roll and she was using the roll to try and stem her bleeding. It was a sickening experience I would rather forget.’

‘This [Chinese] girl didn’t speak much English and seemed very distant and uninterested… blood on condom, blood on my pube region… I could not believe this… I will now have to take a trip to the GUM clinic… great! Overall very poor time had, money was wasted.’

Disgust she is doing it for the money

Although punters make it abundantly clear that they hire escorts only for sex, they are offended if they feel she is doing it only for money.

‘She appears to be in it purely for the money.’

‘Nice enough girl but she is not in the right line of work, she is just trying to make some money…’

‘Counted her money twice, that’s all that matters.’

‘With every thrust of your cock she is laying there thinking “£5, £10, £15, £20”… Once you reach what you’ve paid… she loses interest.’

‘She was totally uninterested apart from getting my money.’

‘You can see she don’t enjoy her job and only in it for the money.’

‘She was cold and distant, oblivious, interested only in the money.’

‘A lot of working girls love the money but hate the job and should do something else.’

‘I reckon she was here just for the money!’

‘Seemed to be totally money-orientated.’

‘She is too materialistic.’

‘I asked her why she did this job. She replied: “Why d’you think? I’ve got loads of money so I’ll become a prostitute”[?]’

‘She… did not move, her eyes closed like she wished she was at school teaching or typing in the office… A punter is supposed to enjoy himself but not by her attitude. You must be in the wrong game luv, it’s not suitable for those just in it for the money.’

‘Typical of bad escort who is doing this just for money.’

Abusing trafficked and obviously forced women

Punternet urges punters to report to the police if they suspect a woman might be trafficked or coerced.[3] A poll held on the forum in 2007 asked: Would you report it to the police if you thought the girl was trafficked? 84% said yes but 16% said no. Two punters who voted ‘no’ added:

‘I think we should concentrate on being punters rather than women rights activists. Did you know that regardless of whether or not you come across the so called trafficked woman (whatever that means), the act of punting contributes to the exploitation of women even though you may not immediately face the impact personally. Shameful. I would give up punting right away if I was a moral person.’

‘It’s just a business transaction to me,  I don’t worry about how the checkout girl in Tesco’s got to be in that job, I couldn’t care less, and the same goes for the girls that I see in parlours or the streets, or on holiday, they are selling a service and I’m buying, that’s all.’

It was clear from some reviews that punters had met trafficked, pimped or forced women, but had proceeded to use them, regardless.

‘[Hungarian girl aged 18]. My guess is she’s been forced into this and doubt her age… Not impressed by Hungarians at all.’ [He still used her.]

‘[A very petite Thai girl] turned her head to one side and screwed her eyes shut. I asked if she was OK? Was I hurting her? She said it was OK carry on just cum quick! … I got off her. She was then concerned that “what you no like me”, “you not find me sexy”… I said not to worry I would just go. But she seemed to get concerned she would be in trouble, I was then concerned if she had a bad pimp who would take it out of her if I left early so I let her try to finish me off by hand… I then left without saying much, and neither did she.’

‘Visited… a Japanese girl who was not quite right and during my visit showed me a piece of paper with “I have no choice” written several times on it. Question is, is she free or is she held, unable to get away by criminals who are using her?’ [He still used her.]

‘The first time I have felt bad about the whole punting experience. Very much the dark side of punting as it is sometimes described in the papers… Not recommended unless you want to ask some real hard questions about yourself afterwards.’

‘The entrance door to the flat was double locked, and the minder [i.e. pimp] kept the key. Definitely a fire hazard and a maid would be preferable…. I would only return for a different girl and preferably without the muscle. The door locks are dangerous (and illegal!)’

‘The final nail in the coffin of this visit was to find the “security” guard standing outside the bedroom door waiting for me when I left.’

[1] Between 1999 and 2009 Punternet members posted over 90,000 reviews of escorts. Catherine Bennett wrote that Punternet men ‘submit their reports in much the same righteous, easily aggrieved tone as the Good Food Guide’s amateur inspectors.’ The Observer, 20 October 2005.

[2] I am a man who has long been concerned about the abuse of women in prostitution.

[3] The site owners claim they are against trafficking or pimping.

Note: This page has been edited to move the section on why punters buy women to a separate page, Myth: Punters are lonely single men.

For a French version of this article, see Prostitution : LES CLIENTS TOMBENT LE MASQUE.

Mugshots of punters arrested in Houston, USA.