Jackie sent this harrowing piece, about how her father sexually abused and sex trafficked her when she was a child, through our Share Your Story page. This provides a space for women to tell of their experiences of the sex trade in their own words.
I’m a survivor of familial sex trafficking. My father started sexually abusing me before I was even two years old and by age six, he was selling me to strangers for sex. This went on until I was about 16 years old.
He threatened my younger brother and me, saying he would kill our mother if we ever told anyone what he was doing. My parents separated when I was six and our mom moved out of town, leaving us with our dad. She thought it was best to leave us in our home, school and with our friends.
My dad moved us to a country town for a few months for work. We were completely isolated from everyone. We were only allowed to talk to our mom a couple of times during the six months we lived there, and weren’t allowed a visit.
My dad bought us a cute little, fluffy white puppy. We only had it just long enough to become very attached to it. He took us out to our usual fishing spot, which was very remote. We would drive in for a mile and walk for another mile. This time he brought the puppy with us. He also brought his rifle and when we got to our fishing spot, he shot our puppy in front of us to prove that he would do the same to our mother.
We moved back home to London and the first visit our mom had, she kept us. So, from then on, we saw our dad every other weekend and for a month in the summer. The sexual, physical and psychological abuse and trafficking still went on during our visits.
He also sometimes would drive to the small town we lived in and pick me up on my walk home from school. When he did this, he would take me out to a remote dirt road somewhere and sexually abuse me, then drop me back off where he had picked me up so I could continue my walk home from school.
Being so young I never actually saw the money change hands. My father would take me to a hotel in London, leave me in the waiting room and go back to the room with the sex buyer. I assume this is when the money and any agreements would take place. They would come back out and my dad would take my hand and place it in the hand of the buyer, who would then lead me back to their room. When it was over my dad would come pick me up.
My father would drug my food or drinks with some sort of sedative on a regular basis before he abused me or sold me, as well as making me drink alcohol. This would make me less resistant to the abuse.
I have a severe spider phobia due to at least one incident of torture by my father. Around 10 years old I had an aquarium filled with bugs and spiders that I had collected, and one night my father came into my room as I slept, pulled the covers back and poured them all out onto me. I had spiders everywhere, even in my mouth! I honestly don’t know if it was a punishment for something or if he just did it for kicks.
When I was 11 or 12 years old my father met my stepmom. She immediately started sexually abusing me as well, and would set up “dates” for me. She was just as bad or even worse than my father was. She kept my brother and me and our two step brothers constantly at odds. I assume it was so we didn’t bond and fight against the abuse (divide and conquer).
There is so much more to my story, but these are the basics. Growing up I was a very rebellious child/teen who took everything out on my mom and stepfather. I hated myself and felt completely unloved and worthless. I honestly believed that I was only good for one thing… to be used by men (and women… my first memory of being sold was to a woman).
After years of trauma counselling and other therapies, I have healed quite well. I now work as a peer support worker helping other survivors and have recently started sharing my story.
Share your story
If you’ve been in the sex trade, or have been affected by it in other less direct ways, and would like to share your story anonymously, please see our Share Your Story page.